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Admission essay excerpt
My mother has always told me that I have a way with people, that I can get out of battle unscathed because of my calm demeanor. She said that this is my best trait and I took that to heart until I graduated in college and became a full-blown career woman. I took interest in working with people and eyed a position as part of human resource management. It also works to my advantage that I’m a great interpreter as a bilingual secretary. I know, however, that I can take it a step further and enhance my managerial skills with the help of an MBA degree. I want to update my skills, be able to think out of the box, and learn new strategies to become a more competent leader and an accomplished woman at that.
Sample outline:
I. Introduction
A. My best trait
i. being calm
ii. being a people person
B. My career
i. holding a position in Human Resource Management
ii. advantage as a bilingual secretary
C. Earning an MBA degree
i. taking it one step further with my career
ii. enhancing my managerial skills
iii. being able to think out of the box
iv. learning new strategies
v. becoming a better leader and more accomplished woman
II. Work experience
A. senior admin officer at ________
B. admin officer at _______
C. admin executive at _________
D. bilingual secretary at ________
E. key responsibilities
i. coordinating with project leaders and members of the team
ii. handling financial reports and other related tasks
iii. performing admin tasks and support
iv. preparing reports for monthly budgets and other accounts
v. organizing meetings
vi. translation and general correspondence
III. My credentials
A. graduating with B Sc. In Business Administration Human Resource Management Option
B. getting a Diploma in Bilingual Secretaryship at _____________
C. Membership to Administrative Professional Association of _________
IV. About myself
A. Personal attributes
i. love for reading and traveling
ii. self-motivated
iii. people person
iv. calm
v. an effective liaison
vi. have the potential to be a leader
vii. team player

When you read sample MBA essays online, you are probably impressed with their content quality and stylistic approaches to essay writing. You can also write as beautifully as the writers of those essays. How? Well, we gathered some helpful pointers on writing MBA personal statements from SAS. Here’s the short list:
Excellent MBA essay samples don’t talk about the school extensively
According to SAS:
Admissions officers already know how great their institutions are (or aren’t). Customization is important, but two or three sentences about the school should suffice.
The whole purpose of your essay is to highlight your qualifications in such a way that the admissions officers will deem you fit for the MBA program and as part of the community. The common mistake among MBA essay writers is devoting a large part of the essay to patronizing the school, citing what makes it a good institution. While this is well and good, the discussion should focus more on your application and how the school makes a good choice for you.
Here’s another tip:
Good essay samples don’t talk about negative things
No need to mention that D+ in Italian History (was Michelangelo his first name or his last?). It’s okay that you couldn’t find a job for 4 months after graduating from college. Your GMAT score is what it is. The personal statement is like a first date; let her know about the credit card debt months later, after you move in.
If you are to mention some challenges in your life such as failures, make sure that you end it up with a positive conclusion. You can say that because of the untoward incidents that happened, you learned a lot from it. Discuss in your essay some lessons learned and how it shaped you into a better person. Don’t make excuses for your failures. Instead, try to dwell on your strengths to show readers your character and adaptability to certain situations.
The Center for Writing Studies of University of Illinois include this as part of the don’ts when writing an MBA essay:
Allow any superficial errors in spelling, mechanics, grammar, punctuation, format, or printing to creep under your vigilant guard.
Even small mistakes will reflect on your character. Spelling errors may indicate your recklessness or lack of focus, same with ignoring the requirements for the format. Much can be said with these simple mistakes that you failed to clear out prior to submitting the essay for final evaluation.
Here’s another common mistake according to the CWS list:
Repeat information directly from the application form itself unless you use it to illustrate a point or want to develop it further.
Your admissions essay should not be a duplicate of your resume or application forms. The admissions panel has carefully evaluated these requirements, so why let them go over your list of accomplishments all over again? It will only be a waste of time. Basically, what you need to tell them is why you’ve decided to pursue an MBA degree, why you’ve chosen the program or school, and what you can offer to the community and the chosen field.
Your application essay can put you one step ahead of other applicants by giving your application the needed boost. Be aware of the common essay mistakes and focus on the more important points of writing an MBA admission essay.

A well-written statement of purpose is one of the requirements that will put you one step ahead to clinching that spot for the MBA program. It will make you stand out from other applicants who may have the same qualifications as you, the same GPA, test scores, or competitive skills you developed from college or years of work experience. Washington State University has some good information about the different topics usually found in many MBA essay samples.
Areas of expertise and interest in MBA personal statement samples
Knowledge or creativity in a field: Describe any of your special interests and how you have developed knowledge in these areas. Give examples of your creativity: the ability to see alternatives; take diverse perspectives; come up with many, varied, or original ideas; or willingness to try new things.
Basically, what the admissions panel would like to know about the applicant is what made him or her interested in the specific MBA program. This shows that you are serious about getting an MBA degree and that you are headed somewhere in choosing a specific MBA program. They want to give the slot to someone who has chosen the program according to his or her goals and not just because of some random decision. While you can always infuse creativity into your writing, you should be careful in doing so. You have to carefully select the details to include in your essay and then make an in-depth discussion about them. Make sure that whatever discussion you choose to take, it would ultimately relate to your application. Be creative but make sure that you don’t compromise clarity and sense of purpose along the way, which is a common mistake among MBA essay writers nowadays.
Here are other tips from the article:
Dealing with obstacles
Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to address this challenge. Include whether you turned to anyone in facing that challenge, the role that person played, and what you learned about yourself.
According to the article, you may discuss some of the most challenging points in your life and use it to show what kind of person you have become because of your learnings. Talking about the obstacles you faced is a great way to show that you are mature enough and that you have experiences that could help you with the journey ahead. However, the common mistake among essay writers is that they make the discussion too overly dramatic for some readers. It turns into a short biography, without clearly specifying how a specific event in your life is important to your application.
Other ideas for MBA essay topics include:
Extracurricular activities from sample essays
Explain what you have done to make your community a better place to live. Give examples of specific projects in which you have been involved over time.
Writing about your community service shows that you are a person who is socially responsible as an active member of a community. This shows what kind of a leader you can become and that you are fully aware of the needs of the world around you. This can earn you plus points, as some MBA programs emphasize on the need for better management for the success of an enterprise.
Goals and dreams in essay samples
Articulate the goals you have established for yourself and your efforts to accomplish them. Give at least one specific example that demonstrates your work ethic/diligence.
Your goals will show that you are a person who is responsible and who is mature enough to plan for his or her future.
According to the ECE Information Portals of Carnegie Melon, another good tip is to use the following set of questions when writing your application essay:
* What career have you chosen? What factors formed this decision?
* What evidence shows that this is a correct choice? That is, how can you show that this choice is realistic? (Personal experience in the field is a good place to begin.)
Good MBA essay samples can serve as your guide to unlocking the secrets to noteworthy personal statements. Study the samples and see how they discuss areas of expertise, goals, and extracurricular activities to highlight the applicant’s qualifications.

One of the most important stages in writing an application essay is brainstorming for topics. You can actually find interesting ideas from various MBA essay samples. Everything About College shares some common topics that you can consider for your personal statement. Here’s a short list:
Some essay topics from MBA essay samples
# A person, event or circumstance that has influenced you, and how it impacted your life. (This may be the most used common essay topic.)
# The greatest challenge you have ever faced.
# Have you taken advantage of the educational opportunities offered to you? How?
The purpose of your personal statement is to give the admissions panel a clear picture of who you are. And you can do this by talking about the experiences and the people around you that made a difference in your life. Talking about the challenges will help the admissions committee measure how strong and strategic you are as a person. Discussing the chances that came into your life, on the other hand, will show how you deal with opportunities and how you turn raw chances into opportunities. Aside from the ones mentioned above, you can also talk about…
# A work of fiction, your favorite character in it, and why.
# Your favorite volunteering/extracurricular activity and what you learned from it. (Read: How you grew)
# Why are you interested in the college you are applying to? Why do you want to come here?
Talking about your favorite fictional character can be an excellent means of baring yourself to the admissions panel. If you talk about your extra-curricular activities, you can show how active you are as a member of a community. And when you talk about the reason you applied to a specific school, you’ll show why you deserve to be there.
How to choose a topic for your admission essay
This excerpt from another source of application essay tips shares some pointers on how to come up with a topic for your essay:
Brainstorming is often a successful way for students to get some of these ideas down on paper. Seeing one’s ideas in writing is often an impetus for the writing process. Though brainstorming is particularly effective when a topic has been chosen, it can also benefit the student who is unable to narrow a topic.
You have to jot down every topic that comes to mind, including those you have seen from MBA essay samples. You have to choose topics that interest you the most or one which you can say interesting things about.
There are many topics you can come up with. It is in choosing the focal point of your application essay that you will encounter utmost difficulty. You have to choose a topic that you are most comfortable writing about.

Your MBA essay is one of the most important requirements for MBA application. This is why you have to exert much effort into writing an essay that would make the admissions committee remember you. Jobs and Scholarships shares some important points that could help you write an MBA essay that will let you steal a spot for admission.
Read MBA essay samples
Although there are no clear-cut rules to writing an admission essay, there are certain things that the Admission Board expects their business school applicants to include in their essays. Browse through MBA essay samples of successful applicants to get a feel of what the Admission Board prefers in terms of essay structure and composition.
You can find several MBA essay samples from university websites as well as school application guides online. These samples will show how winning personal statements are written. It will show you different ways on how to discuss your MBA application to the admissions panel.
Here’s another tip:
As you read, make a checklist of the important elements that should never go missing when you write your own admission essay: personal goals and insights, influences, relevant accomplishments, and a plan of action. From the samples, identify which qualities are valued by the business school.
You have to keep in mind, however, that you have to speak through your own voice. Only use MBA essay samples as guide. Make sure that you don’t plagiarize. Your application essay should be unique, personal, and honest.
Keeping your essay concise
You should be clear with your personal goals, and keep your discussion focused on experiences which are consistent with your purpose. To keep from rambling on and on, set aside a time for brainstorming before preparing an outline. Make a list of the things that motivated you to pursue an MBA.
The number of words for the MBA essay is limited. And so, you have to share your points of view with utmost clarity and as concise as you can. Aside from this, you need to be clear about creating a picture of yourself for them to get to know you better.
According to another article on successful applications:
Focus your energy on painting a concise, complete, and well-thought-out picture of who you truly are, rather than present what you think the Admissions Committee is looking for in response to essay questions.
Again, you have to speak through your own voice. You can use essay samples as a guide but this doesn’t give you the right to plagiarize. You have to show sincerity through your essay. The admissions committee have read a lot of essays before. For sure, they can see through your lies.
You are a unique individual, and you have to show it through your essay. Make sure that your MBA essay is clear, concise, tight, and original.

One of the benefits of having an MBA degree is that it can serve as your passport to tons of opportunities for career improvement and advancement. An MBA degree can land you a promotion, get a raise, and possibly secure tenure from your company. Applying to business schools is a breeze as long as you have your documents ready, including an impeccably written MBA admission essay. To help you come up with a winning essay, read MBA essay samples on the Internet. To help you decide which school to apply to, below is a list of the top ten business schools in the US:
Harvard Business School
Harvard Business School or HBS was founded in 1908, and have been producing alumni with notable achievements and hold top business positions. The MBA programs in HBS arm their students with combined theoretical knowledge and practical application thereof through immersion programs.
Stanford Graduate School of Business
One of the features of Stanford’s MBA program that stands out from the rest is the wide selection of courses they offer, which allows students to have a specialization by tailoring their curriculum according to their field of interest. Stanford’s business school alumni roster includes GlaxoSmithKline’s CEO, Dr. Jean Pierre Garnier.
Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania
Wharton has one of the largest business school faculties that is comprised of lecturers with diverse specialties and global business expertise. The Wharton School is also one of the very first business schools in the world, and has produced notable alumni like business mogul Donald Trump.
Kellogg School of Management
The Kellogg School of Management is one of the schools of Northwestern University, and is one of the business schools that constantly appear on the top five of MBA program rankings. Business Week ranks Kellogg as the top business school for their quality executive MBA program.
Ross School of Business
The Ross School of Business of the University of Michigan offers a wide range of MBA programs such as full-time MBA, global MBA, evening MBA, and executive MBA. Ross is also often placed high on business school rankings because of their diverse selections of advanced elective programs.
MIT Sloan School of Management
MIT is considered by a lot of people as one of the best business schools in the US. This is further evidenced by its high rankings on US News and Business Week, which place the MIT Sloan on the top five slots.
Haas School of Business
The Haas School of Business is the business arm of the University of California – Berkeley. Haas offers different types of MBA programs — full-time MBA, weekend or evening MBA, and the Berkeley-Columbia Executive MBA.
Columbia Business School
The Columbia Business School is one of the six Ivy League business schools in the US, and is known for its highly selective admissions process. Offering diverse courses taught by accomplished and recognized faculty members, the Columbia Business School prides itself on the extensive practical and theoretical knowledge it imparts to its students.
Darden Graduate School of Business Administration
One of the business schools that emphasize experiential learning is the University of Virginia’s Darden Graduate School of Business Administration. Through case-based teaching methods, Darden’s MBA program provides students with applicable real-world business knowledge that is necessary in the world of business, entrepreneurship, and finance.
University of Chicago
The University of Chicago – Graduate School of Business offers quality MBA programs that are recognized for their excellence in providing essential knowledge on the fields of accounting, quantitative marketing, accounting, economics, etc.
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When it comes to effective modern learning strategies, nothing could compare to the wonders of computer technology. I could attest very well to this. I was born and raised in a suburb that basically has more animals than people, so the idea of going to school, getting good grades and a diploma and all that seems like such a distant thing. But I heard about it from Hyacinth, my cousin who hails from New York, and she’s an MBA from one of the finest Universities in the city. She would tell me about the wonders of going to school, about meeting classmates and teachers, and yes, of encountering technologies. The only piece of technology I knew then as that huge machine we use to grind wheat and barley. Hyacinth gave me a scholarship and took me with her to New York, where I studied from grade school to high school. Then, I got a job as a sales clerk in a fastfood outlet and supported myself to college. After four years, I was able to finish my bachelor’s degree in education, majoring in computer technology. This began my passion for information technology.
Information technology for me is not only the key to advancement. It is advancement. We are currently in the information era–the period in time when knowledge is power. If you have knowledge, you get influence. With the knowledge that you have, you get respect. With that respect, you get opportunities. When you have opportunities, you get a job. When you get a job, you get money. And then, you have the option to use it to help others advance themselves. Now what better way to spread knowledge and empower the people than through information technology.
When I finished my bachelor’s degree, I headed off to an international school and got a job as a software developer and teacher. As a software developer, I was able to manage our school’s website and cause it to win the local Most Wanted Web Awards last 2004. As a teacher, I was able to coach my students all throughout learning not just the benefits of computers but also the benefits of mankind to computers. Basically, my principle is that you should not let gadgets control you; instead, you should control the gadget. That is what I call real power. I believe this is the principle that caused such a revolution in my classes–for the past three years that I taught, some 30 to 40 percent of the graduates every year sought a career in information technology. And, they would always come back to the school and commend me for having inspired them to be the driving force behind the industry of information technology.
Now, as I proceed to take an MBA in information technology management with the aid of the school in which I served for the past three years, my goal is to lead our school’s information technology team with zeal and expertise. I believe I can achieve all of this and acquire all the skills I need through the MBA. With all my experience and capabilities, I am assured that I have what it takes to be the right candidate for this program.
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Utopia. It means a perfect society, one that is devoid of all distraction, chaos, and disorder. Is it possible in today’s society, when war is on the roll once more between people of varying languages and cultures, when the basis for respect is if you have power, wealth, and popularity? Times like these, a utopian society may no longer come into existence, but at least, in our own humble ways, we can contribute to the realization of a community that lives up to its name–a group of people who are united in cause and faith.
This is my principle as a psychologist. I have been in the service of an educational institution for four years now as a guidance counselor. As one, I get to mingle with students, listen to their whims, their angst, and all the things that they would not tell their parents or even their peers. Come days when the students would not go to school, I double as a trainer for the teachers and the library staff. I don’t necessarily teach them the three R’s of learning, which I so believe is already their expertise. I teach them–no, I share with them–about LIFE, what it is for me, what it could be for them, how we could lead each other to grow in our lives every single day. And I’m glad to see results. Once, a high school girl came to me crying, saying she was raped by her boyfriend. I helped her recuperate. It wasn’t easy. She needs somebody to talk to all the time. After a few months, she’s moved on. Now, she is on her way to becoming a psychologist, just like me.
This as well as other key events in my life as a psychologist inspired me to pursue a masters in business administration degree in the field of organizational development. This should allow me to bring my innate organizational and leadership capacities to full use through studies, training, and research on bringing about positive development not just in an organization as a whole, but with every individual who is part of the organization. I would like to test myself and be involved in an educational institution with people who, like me, have a passion for people and for doing things for people the humble way.
With the skills and competencies that I will be garnering from my MBA in organizational development, my goal is to get into an administrative position in the academe, specifically in organizational development. This will help me bring about my dream of a utopian society–a society that is built on love. This will also help me be at par with the successful individuals in the industry and add to that my own touch of magic–that is, humility and love.
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In life, I have learned that with age comes a greater appreciation for more extensive learning through the discovery of self and intellectual limitations. At the current stage of my career development, I feel that my current skills and knowledge could be further girded with a higher education befitting the skill sets required of a true business professional in the 21st century. As new and great challenges present themselves, so too do new opportunities in learning valuable real-life lessons arise.
As a former student active in sports, social and civic clubs, the values and morals that have been instilled in me in my previous scholastic and extra curricular endeavors have molded me into an individual whose goal is not merely to turn in a profit, but to observe sound morals and practices as well. My previous training in debate clubs and political science forums allow me to view competition with pre-emptive measures and a keen sense of gut feel that allows me to maneuver accordingly.
The cutthroat realm that is contemporary business makes for a barbaric arena where competitors and even co-workers are at each other’s throats all the time. My previous work with charities and civic groups has brought me a level of compassion that I would like to impart upon those whose lives I will be touching base with on a daily basis.
Of course, all this would be for naught if I would not be bringing all my previous experiences to the table as a corporate professional. I believe that combining the past with a business graduate education in the present would lead to a very bright and promising future. I also believe that through the analysis of the inner workings of management, finance and economics, I would be arming myself for future needs and rounding out my business acumen as a whole. These personal experiences and my own passion to succeed are what I primarily need to become a triumphant businessman, but these are not enough to stay competitive in the future as I would have to know the technical aspects of business as well.
These are the reasons why I would like to enter into business school. Aside from learning all the abstract theories involved, I would also be working on the material aspects of business by working while taking the course. Once I have completed the course, I would like to take up a doctorate degree as it is my ultimate dream to become a professor of business in the future, guiding those who, like me, have a passion for the inner workings of business as well as the moral fiber and character to proceed within it in good faith.
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Though an individual who has gone through numerous administrative positions, I feel that the arena of finance and business is so intricate and complex that I have only scratched upon the surface of a profession that runs deep with professional opportunities. Pursuing a Masters in Business Administration would allow me to further enhance my present skills by augmenting it with those that I am unfamiliar with, thus allowing me to take my knowledge of the industry to an entirely new level.
Being an only daughter in a middle class family that, much success was expected of me, especially since I would be the future breadwinner of my family when my parents retire. As such, it has always been my goal to develop a career based on a practical profession that offers lucrative propositions despite shifting trends in society and culture, and so I accomplished a degree in Business Economics with a concentration in Finance. My knack for mathematics coupled with my instinctive and family-values instilled views on money helped me breeze through being a student and being a professional in the field.
I have had work experience ever since I was a student at high school, working at a café during after school hours and being a personal assistant part-time during the summer. Though I was earning money for myself, much of it went to helping my family get through the regular monthly bills, which taught me to make do and be especially careful of the little money that I had left for myself. My experiences with work and money aided me in deciding on my future career and the degree that I would eventually pursue.
In my studies as a university student, I had the privilege of working at a local finance firm that offered comfortable yet unchallenging tasks, prodding me to seek for more work related responsibilities in the field of finance and accounting. This stimulus led me to an account management job at a copyrighting firm where the stressful environment and on-demand deadlines trained me to think as a manager that produces results on time.
I currently hold an administrative position in an accounting firm, which is a job that I hold dear tremendously. It is extremely satisfying for me to be able to cull all the previous education and skill sets that I have acquired and apply them to work that is multi-faceted. Though I am certainly challenged by all the multi-tasking that I would have to do during the day, I still feel that this position contains a glass ceiling; a glass ceiling that must be broken in my desire to increase my career value.
It is with this intent that I propose my desire to undertake your MBA program. It is only through your course that I would be able to increase my knowledge about business and the world of finance, as well as enable me to enhance my current skill set.
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